Understanding the Why of X, Y Differences

By Laurie Grace

Apples and oranges. Venus and Mars. Yin and yang.

The comparisons of woman and man have been my topic of interest, research, and study for more than two years. My goal was to learn more about men, and along the way I learned quite a bit more about my own complex side of the species.

My journey continues and has certainly been interesting, at times mind-boggling, and worth sharing.

So this past Tuesday I shared some of those lessons with a group of 35 women. Times Ten Cellars provided a wonderful space for us to cozy-in, wine in hand, and explore the world of men and their unique design.

My address for the evening was titled “What Makes Men Tick.” I talked about seven basics that are true of men. Each item was uniquely different for women, hence the great opportunity for us to live at odds with one another.

My personal journey and study has taught me that, yes, there is a better way than living in discord. There is a new possibility.

The essence behind everything I taught that evening was this basic principle: when we can better understand the design and purpose for something, we can appreciate it and experience it with more acceptance and pleasure.

I have learned how common it is for women to compare men’s actions, words, and responses to what a woman would do in the same context. By default, our womanly frame of reference is woman. And in this day and age of the self-sufficient woman, it is typical for a man to interact with a woman as if she is a kind of softer, gentler man. Again, his manly frame of reference is man. This seems to be our fall-back modus operandi. That was true for me, I know.

But, I’ve learned there is a better way: to appreciate and understand men for who they are, for how they are designed, and for men to appreciate women in the same way. The starting point to any kind of change is knowledge. I have found that knowledge can create new possibilities in powerful ways.

Knowledge leads to understanding, understanding leads to wisdom, and from wisdom we can tap transformation.

What I shared with those 35 women is that room exists for us to create a greater sense of partnership in our relationships with men. All men.

What’s on the other side of this? For me, I am living with a deeper and richer sense of harmony and satisfaction in my relationships.

I have found that investing in yourself and in your relationships has the possibility to create returns that are immeasurable.

I have more relationship talks to come, including one for men only. So, I will continue to share my vision of creating a new personal investment strategy, one focused on yourself and that special person right beside you.

A strategy that can yield great personal, emotional, returns.

Laurie Grace, an East Dallas resident, owns and operates Laurie Grace Coaching, which helps people work toward a higher level of success in life, relationships, and business.


  1. Gary Smalley has a great series also on the right brain-left brain concepts and how to understand them.

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